Suicidal Love
by Romanogers95
Summary: (One-shot) Natasha gives Steve the most precious gift she can give. (Rated M for Major character death and other minor, violent descriptions.)


**Warning this one-shot could cause crying. Tissues within arm's reach are advised.**

 **Listening to halo by Beyoncé while reading this could cause death from crying so much. -sorry**

Steve held their new-born daughter in his arms as tears poured down his cheeks. Natasha knew the outcome to this, but she did it to give Steve what he always wanted; a family. Except now, his family was still incomplete. She was gone.

*7 months earlier*

Natasha fell into his arms from pure happiness.

The pair had just found out they were having the baby they didn't think was possible.

…

"Mrs Romanoff I must warn you there can be extreme and risky consequences with this pregnancy I must advise you not to go through with it." The doctor said.

"And ruin Steve's dreams? Sorry but it's happening whether you like it or not." She replied walking out of the room.

"Steve! It's a girl" Natasha grinned seeing him in the waiting room.

She daren't tell him as he would automatically demand that her heath was more important.

Steve beamed with pride and couldn't stop talking about it all the way home.

However, Natasha couldn't stop looking at his grinning face; trying to memorise every little detail before she it was too late and she would never see him again.

Over the next few months Natasha's bump grew and so did Steve's excitement. He threw a party at every opportunity which Tony quickly obliged to hosting, excessive amounts of toys and clothes were brought; all of which were pink.

But Natasha on the other hand felt more scared every day that passed. Not because she knew she was going to die, but because she knew she would never see him again. She may never get to see her child - their child. She would never save the world again.

With every scan the doctor said the same thing. 'don't do this' 'there's still time' 'he loves you more'

However, Natasha knew exactly what she had to do, give him what he deserved. A family.

…

With 1 week till her due date Natasha wrote Steve a letter;

 _My dearest Steve,_

 _Please forgive me. Please treasure our Daughter like you did with me, teach her to be good. Watch her grow and help her understand the world around her. My life is over, but yours and hers together has just started just please make sure she doesn't make the same mistakes I did, it would break my heart. I love you both with all I can give and I will always make sure no one hurts you, ever! But if you ever needed anything that I can't give you, please reach out to someone, our daughter will never be short of uncles and I know that Clint or Bucky will help you with anything, as they did for me. Please don't blame yourself or our daughter for what has happened in this awful fate this was all from me though I would give so much to be there with both of you now, I knew it was either you, our daughter or both of you without me and though you may not think so I feel I have made the right decision for all of us. I love you with all of me Steve please let our daughter think the same._

 _Your Natasha xx_

She couldn't stop crying the whole time she wrote.

She put the note in the draw beside their bed and kissed a sleeping Steve in her cheek.

She then went and sat on the chair in the corner.

What happened next was all a blur,

An earth-shattering pain shot through her stomach making her cry out. Steve immediately jumped out of bed and ran to Natasha's side, pressing the alarm button in the process.

Natasha was rushed down to the medical wing where several doctors were waiting for her. Steve lifted her up onto the bed and assured her that it would all be okay though he was nervous himself.

As her contraction got stronger the midwife pressured her to push.

And just 10 short minutes later Natasha pushed a gorgeous baby girl into the world.

Steve cut the cord and lifted the new being into his arms bringing her closer to Natasha.

After then for Natasha everything went in slow motion, she watched a smile bengin of Steve's face as it grew bigger she realized she wouldn't trade this moment for anything – it was all worth it, all the missions, all the kisses and all of time was adding up to this moment; to see how happy Steve was with their daughter.

"I Love you so much Nat!" that was the last of Steve's voice she heard before it all went black.

…

Steve's smile quickly turned to terror when he saw Natasha start to close her eyes and her pulse start to slow. Doctors started to rush around her and a nurse took their daughter away from him before pushing him out the door for more room.

The other avengers were outside the hospital room and rushed to Steve to find out what was happening.

"Steve!" Clint shouted. "What happened?"

"She's gone. I can feel it." He replied in a whisper.

-Silence.

"NO! NO, THIS CANT HAPPEN." Clint pushed his head into his hands. "She has to make it out of this, she always does!"

Tony rested against the corridor wall and closed his eyes while Bruce rushed into the hospital room to see if there was anything he could help with.

20 minutes later a doctor came out making the other Avengers lift their heads.

"There was nothing more we could do." He said softly. "I'm sorry for your loss."

Steve immediately lost it and erupted into a pile of tears in the hospital hall way followed by Clint. Even Tony and Thor appeared to shed a tear or two.

She was gone, and there was nothing anyone could do.

…

3 days later-

Steve was back at the tower with their healthy baby daughter when he found the note in Nat's bedside draw after going through a few of her things. He read it with more tears spilling down his cheeks, something that had rarely stopped over the past days.

When he had gotten to the end of the letter he knew what their daughters name would be-

Natalyn-Rose Rogers

And Steve would raise her to be beautiful and strong; just like her mom.

 **I literally did cry writing this but luckily it has nothing to do with any of my other fics. Feel free to leave a one-shot request in the reviews or pm me. -Happy Halloween if you celebrate it.** **J**


End file.
